Positive Parents Give Children an ‘I Can’ Attitude

Are you concerned that your child isn’t working up to her potential at school?

You can help. First, make sure you have realistic expectations for your child’s age and level of development. If you expect too much, your child will feel intimated. She’ll think, “I can’t,” rather than, “I can.”

Then do these things to foster an “I can” attitude in your child:

- Love your child for who she is, not what she does. Never imply she’s more valuable when she shines or performs well.

- Help your child see herself as a capable person. Help her identify and build on her strengths—areas she enjoys and does well in.

- Help your child set her own goals—not yours.

- Encourage your child to try doing things on her own. This communicates that you believe in your child.

- Teach your child to assess her own behavior. Help her see the connection between what she wants and her actions.

- Say it’s okay to make mistakes. That’s how we learn. Share some of your own mistakes and lessons learned.

Source: Linda Mitchell, RN, “Thanks for Helping Me Succeed in School,” Texas Department of Protective and Regulatory Services, www.tdprs.state.tx.us/Child_Protection/pdf/ecap-24.pdf.
(Reprinted with permission from the April 2004 issue of Parents Still make the difference!® (Middle School Edition) newsletter. Copyright © 2004 The Parent Institute®, a division of NIS, Inc.)